met gala fashion review
brought to you by kit and sass, revered style experts (once again)
we’ve all seen the pictures, we’ve all seen the memes, we’ve all seen mike faist’s little turnip. the 2024 MET gala has been reverberated into the backs of our heads, and we all have some opinions. but have we truly considered the return of kit and sass’s VIOs (Very Important Opinions, for those not yet in the know)? Our monumental phone call lasted an hour and ten minutes, and not a second was wasted. we have AN-A-LYSED these looks and have much to report upon.
first, a word on the theme confusion - this year’s theme was ‘the garden of time’ based on a j.g.ballard short story about a couple with a blah-blah garden and they blah-blah get turned into blah-blah stone. okay, everyone got that? it was NOT sleeping beauties: reawakening fashion, that was the theme of the exhibition that the MET has just opened. although we now know that, some of the celebrities and their stylists clearly didn’t, so some of these looks are just completely not on theme, and that’s okay, we forgive them (although i will point them out when i feel it’s necessary). also, kit was particularly peeved at how many people chose beige or white to correlate with stone, and i think floral was overdone. okay, everyone got that? on with the lewks…….
we’ve all seen zendaya by now, and of course, this slayed the house boots mama down! lurve the makeup, lurve the signature galliano stripes, lurve the little grapes. the way she walks brought the look to life, and i’d be lying if i didn’t admit that i’ve been practising that pose in the mirror every night since monday. statues can still slay!! someone tell everyone else in attendance….
this fit is doing a lot, and kit and i of course had differing opinions. i think the hat kind of makes him look like a scottie dog keychain one might purchase in the gift shop at edinburgh airport, but kit likes the sewing details. we both agreed that the tiny glasses are giving wicked’s emerald city, in a kind of cool way. maybe take one element off? we’re thinking the chaps…
okay, here we have the first of many, many, shades of beige. but, ya know what? she is still giving. i love the wooden, structured bodice, and kit liked the drapey waist fabric. it fits the brief — she is literally a statue. we thought it might be a bit sweaty under that wood, but what else is fashion for but to make the wearer entirely uncomfortable? :)
not our fave ayo look ever, ngl - we both said it was slightly ‘lunch and hitting up cath kidson with a minor member of the royal family core’. at least it’s clear she’s read the story, but obviously she would, she’s ayo edibiri.
there’s definitely some things to like about this dress - the black outline is slightly giving pop-art, especially with the monroe-style lippy and hair. kit wishes the makeup could’ve been a bit more interesting, and we both said the dress reminded us of lemon pavlova. maybe the black trim could have been tied in with the bodice in some way? definitely not the worst, but needed a final something-something…
mike - the turnip is doing A LOT of heavy lifting, but it is up-lifting us, so you get away with it this time…
okay, i LOVE this, and kit relinquished some expression of admiration too. the way the fabric is draped is reminiscent of marble statues in which the marble becomes material, so it’s perfectly on theme. the jewellery is beaut, the glitter on the collarbones is stun, i love the hair (kit is less keen) but we both agree that the icy flowers on her shoulders are the stars of the show, and deserve every accolade!
okay, again, i really like this and kit wasn’t so sure. it’s giving 18th century friend of the king, if you catch my drift, and the red underneath kinda looks like she’s free bleeding (in the best way!) kit is confused by the norse elements (hair and choker), wishing they’d pulled in the royal mistress vibes the whole way through. she was also very perturbed by the ‘ungodly shoes staring at her’, with which i can only agree - they let the look down, chloë, girl…
as menswear goes, at least usher put a little bit of effort in here. kit said ‘that hat needs to burn, and if it did it would smell like tire’. bit harsh, but ultimately fair, cos, like, what tf is that? the cloak, the shoes, the glitter suit all slay - i think they added that flower at the last minute as a desperate cling onto the theme - okay fine, you get away with it…
the shirt kinda reminds me of going into a topshop in 2013 and trying on a pair of ill-fitting aztec leggings, so i might hold my fire on calling harris ‘boring’, although he’s getting away with a hell of a lot. kit did not hold her fire, lets just say that…
it’s a no from us - the hair is giving lydia from beetlejuice and the skinny shawl is giving the weird worm from beetlejuice. if the theme had been tim burton’s 1988 film ‘beetlejuice’, this would have blown us out the park. but no, the theme was ‘the garden of time’, so. you fail. it’s just such a boring dreeeeeessssss like why choose black? go girl give us nothing
we found it kinda funny how zoomed out this photo is compared to everyone else’s - the skirt is lowkey giving primary school parachute which kinda makes me love it, i’m just not sure about the hat - it makes her look a bit like a biro that’s broken at the bottom so all the ink is spilling out… kit said ‘we can’t all be rihanna’ :)
jon batiste ur usually pulling looks left right and centre, and this is so disappointing. florals? for spring? how inspiring! we did both like the jewellery and the way it matched with the waistcoat. i just think menswear can be so cool, why does it have to be boring? why does anything have to be boring?
lowkey don’t even know who this is but we’re both obsessed. okay, yes, it’s not super on theme, yes it’s beige, but it’s also SICK. who is doing little old lady chic these days? who is doing woven goat bags? who is doing bow tie AND veil? i’ll tell u who, it’s cole escola (whoever u are)
also don’t know who this is but she also fucking KILLED IT i love this so much - proof that, as kit said, womenswear doesn’t have to be ‘sexy’ (although lowkey this is kinda sexy). the slingback heels are like what i imagine the little mermaid would wear the first day her feet don’t feel like she’s walking on pins. love the coat, love the earrings (like droplets of sand) - kit said she looks like a klimt painting, and HELL THE FUCK YEAH to more art in fashion!!!
even though we got through a good 30 people more i’m going to end it here for everyone’s sanity. because kim, you have a lot to think about. the cardigan is disgusting, like, what are we doing? it’s giving velvet sofa cushions and white crusty dog vibes. the silhouette is so boring :( kit wasn’t mad at the chain mail-y vibe of the overlay, but come on kim, if ur gonna show up to a fashion event, you have to DO fashion.
special shoutouts: Tyla’s sand dress (she had to be lifted up the stairs!), camilla cabello’s ice block bag, demi moore’s peacock georgia o’keefe moment!
thank you for reading and as always, take these opinions with a grain of salt. i have worn the same pair of shorts for the last four days - we hope you are well!